Premise:

Mid-December of 2003, Lynati went to visit Aaron and Mara. Around that time a discussion had popped up in Station 8, concerning the infamous Mary Sue Litmus test.

Now, Lynati had recently been re-reading the writings of Fleur Rhine, having been reminded of their existence since reading a fic that temporarily crossed over with Norcumi’s universe. And among the writings on Fleur’s site is a contest between the main characters of her two sagas, to see who rated as a bigger Mary Sue.

 

So, wanting to share the amusement that fic provided, and having a good excuse to do so, Lyn dragged Aaron and Mara to the site, and they had a read.

 

…And then, inspired by Fleur, they decided to run an original character from each of their personal fanfic universes, to see how they measured up. Mara chose Rapture; Aaron chose Death; and Lynati chose Nemesis.

 

Let’s see how they did….

 

*

 

WARNING  - This fic contains adult language and occasional references to naughty bits of anatomy. And you, knowing who co-authored this, are not the least bit surprised, are you?

 

*

 

 

The (Original) Mary Sue Litmus Test (for Gargoyles fan fiction)
by Melissa "Merlin Missy" Wilson    missy@reimer.com Copyright 1997, 2003

 

 

Section 1 - The Name Game

Is the character named after you? (This can be your first name, middle name, or the name you go by in chat or irc.) If so, stop now. Put your pencil (mouse?) down and turn in your test.[10]
DO NOT NAME YOUR CHARACTER AFTER YOURSELF.
DO NOT NAME YOURSELF AFTER YOUR CHARACTER.
I DON'T CARE WHAT YOUR EXCEPTION IS.

Nemesis: No

Death: Obviously not.

Rapture: No.

 

Is the character's name an unusual spelling of a more common name or word?[1]

Rapture: (shrug) They are all spelled correctly.

 

Is the character's name unusual in another way?

(All three): …

 Nemesis: What do you think?

Death: (sarcastic) No, the world is full of people who are named Nemesis, Death and Rapture.

Nemesis: Maybe in Berkeley.

 

A female with a male-sounding name?[1]

Death:: Actually they’re all pretty gender neutral.


A name the character chose for him or herself, because s/he "didn't want to forget"?[1]

Rapture:: *SIGH*

Nemesis: 0 Death: 0 Rapture: 1


A noun or adjective not normally used for a name (especially for human characters)[1]?
(Touchy with gargoyle characters, but use your discretion. Would any self-respecting gargoyle really want to go through life with this name?)

(Here Nemesis points out the origination of her name versus the other two.)

Nemesis: HAHA

Nemesis: 0 Death: 1 Rapture: 2

 

Does the character have a really cool name that you wish you had?[1]

Nemesis: What are you talking about, I do have my name!

Rapture: She means the author.

Nemesis: Oh. I knew that.

 

Is the character's name in the title of the story or is the title otherwise a description of the character? (i.e. "The Girl Who Could Fly")[5]

Rapture: *SIGH*

Nemesis: Gimme a second, my author has to go through her story files…

(Three Hours Later.)

Nemesis: Author says, “Not yet”.

Death: My first appearance’s story title was stolen from a Stephen King - Peter Straub novel.

Nemesis: 0 Death: 1 Rapture: 3

 

Is the character named Hunter?[1]
(If the character's last name is Canmore, ignore this question.)

(This question is ignored.)

 

Is the character a gargoyle originally from Wyvern circa 994 who had a name back then?[3]

Death: See above. 1996

Rapture: 1976

Nemesis: I wasn’t even born in this dimension! I was twenty-two when I came over in 2000.

 

Is the character one of Oberon's Children whose name you made up because you liked the sound of it?[2] (Every fay we've met has been from a legend of some sort. Odds are good the rest are, too.)

Nemesis: Anyone Fay?

Rapture:: No.

Death:: Being part demon doesn’t count. Hey, aren’t you part Fay, Nem?

Nemesis: I’m not a child of Oberon. Moots the question.

 

Does the character have more than one name? (i.e. a nickname or a pseudonym that other characters use to refer to the character)[1]

Nemesis:: Yeah…

Rapture:: Well, yeah, the whole masquerading as a human during the day thing, you know.

Death:: Not unless “Beak Boy” counts.

Nemesis: 1 Death: 1 Rapture: 4

 

Did you spend more than a day looking for just the right name?[1]

Death: No

Nemesis: Nope

Rapture: No.

 

Have you considered naming your pet or child the character's name?[1]

Nemesis: 0.o

Rapture: You’d have to be joking.

Death: What she said.

Nemesis: …You know, I’ve got a sister named Rapture.

Rapture: Considering the intense genealogy I’d be amazed there wasn’t some relative of yours named “Kitchen Sink”.

 

Section 2 - Physical Attributes

Is the character the same gender as you?[1]

Nemesis: And she has the same complexion, isn’t it amazing?

Death: Fifty-fifty odds, not much of a question. Unless Oscar’s been writing Gargie fic.

Rapture: Considering my author wrote it in first person perspective, it’d be odd if I were male… Especially since I’m mated to Brooklyn.

Death: I thought your author loved yaoi.

Nemesis: Matt Watson anyone?

Rapture: Gods no.

Nemesis: 2 Death:: 2 Rapture:5

 

Is the character from the same racial group as you?[1]
(Note: if the character is a gargoyle, fay, or another magical/genetically altered being, answer yes to this question.)

Aaron: THAT’S NOT FAIR… That makes no sense.

(Death suppresses his author.)

Nemesis: What if we’re hybrids of something other than the mentioned categories?

Rapture: This is to ensure that all gargoyles fanfic characters score something on the Litmus test, obviously.

Nemesis: 3 Death: 3 Rapture: 6

 

Is the character a hybrid of two or more species?[3]

Nemesis: *grumbles*

Death: Technically… yes.

Rapture: Fuck, I’m part human, I had blocked that.

Nemesis: 6 Death: 6 Rapture: 9

Nemesis: Shit, I can pretty much count on one hand the number of people in my…home, who *aren’t* hybrids of at least two species.


Is the character a cross-breed of any other type? (i.e. multi-racial, multi-clan)[1]

Nemesis:  I’m not even part of one clan.

Death: Doesn’t the Annex count?

Nemesis: (pause) I suppose.

Rapture: Nope.

Nemesis: Actually I’m not sure… I might be.

Nemesis: 7 Death: 6 Rapture: 9

 

Is the character not subject to limitations normally put upon someone of this species? (Examples: A character who is any part gargoyle but does not turn to stone at dawn. A character who is in any part fay but is not vulnerable to iron. A human who is immortal.)[4]

Nemesis: I don’t have a species! (pause) And I’m part Fay but I am allergic to silver.

Death: (shrug)

Rapture: That was magic! *grumbles*

Nemesis: 7 Death: 6 Rapture:13

Rapture: Plus four? FUCK ME!


Note: Take away four points if the character does not have the benefits of being part of the race but still has the drawbacks. (Examples: A character who is any part gargoyle who cannot fly, ever, in your entire story series. A character who is part fay who cannot work magic, ever, in your entire story series.) Take away only one point if the character eventually does get the benefit, anywhere in the story series.

Rapture: This test is HAAAARD.

Nemesis: I don’t have any vampiric super strength and..again, the silver!

Death: Yeah, but the vampiric speed and mesmeric gaze count, and aren’t you at least as strong as Brooklyn?

Nemesis: He grows stronger than me later in the series...once he’s no longer Undead and resumes maturing naturally…(pouts)

 

Is the character a teenager or in her/his early twenties?[1]

Rapture: This whole test is against me! *weeps*  I’m not like her!

Nemesis: At what point in the story?

Rapture: I assume they mean the intro.

Nemesis: *Which* intro? The series starts about fifty years before I’m born.

Death: The character’s intro.

Nemesis: But you see me born!

Rapture: You’re introed into the Gargs’ universe in your early twenties, take the point.

Nemesis: Feh.

Death: We came out of the cloning tank at the equivalent age of 18 so.. yeah.

Nemesis: 8 Death: 7 Rapture:14

 

Does the character look like s/he is a teenager or in her/his early twenties for no apparent reason[2]?

Nemesis: (frowns) You get to see me past thirty in the series! Of course then I de-age myself… stupid Merlin.

Rapture: Ha! I’m naturally my age. No point for me here!

Death: Demona aged us to when we could be useful.

For a magical or special scientific reason[2]?

Death: *grumbles*

Nemesis:8 Death: 8 Rapture:14

 

That you plan on making a plot point later?[1]

Death: *grumbles further* Just because Sevarius figured out to retard the aging process so that Demona could keep us around longer. Point each for me and Nem.

Nemesis: Since when is aging normally a plot point?

Rapture: If you de-aged yourself at a future date?

Nemesis: But.. but… DAMMIT!

Nemesis:9 Death: 9 Rapture:14

 

Is the character the age you would like to be?[1]

Rapture: My author says she wouldn’t be fifteen again if you paid her.

Nemesis: Response is a vehement “NO.” over here.

Death: No.

 

Is the character beautiful or roguishly handsome?[1]

Rapture: You’re just jealous! I look like Aunty. (sticks her tongue out.)

Nemesis: (really really quietly) Lex thinks so..

Death: I have a metal arm and microchips for pupils. And a beak.

Rapture: But Ventura likes you.

Death: (twitches) And she’s a headcase, your point?

Rapture: But all the female readers think you’re bishy and hot.

Nemesis: And all my author’s fanart of you…

Death: (sigh)

Nemesis: And her too!

Nemesis:9 Death: 9 Rapture:15

 

Does one or more of the regulars find the character highly attractive?[1]

Rapture:: (grumbles) I hate this test. Part of the plan was dependent on me being attractive! And hey, Brooklyn finds EVERY female highly attractive.

Nemesis: (brightens a bit)

Death: Well.. if Hyena counts as a regular then yeah.

Nemesis:10 Death: 10 Rapture:16

 

Do other regulars see him/her as a threat because of this?[1]

Rapture: Yaye! Not because of that. Whoo hoo, no point.

Nemesis: Well, Goliath does…

(The other two look askance at her.)

Nemesis (shrugs): Lex left clan Wyvern for me.

Death:  Didn’t Brooklyn leave clan Wyvern for you, Ronnie?

 

(Brief but furious author debate occurs off screen)

 

Rapture:  (Looks sulky again)

Nemesis:11 Death: 10 Rapture:17

 

Does the character have an unusual eye color for no apparent reason?[3]

Rapture:  No.  Woo-hoo!

Nemesis:  Claret red is a typical vampire eye color, when I was born they were a perfectly normal grey…kinda like your author, Death.

Death:  I have chip pupils.  I have no eye color.  Now, if *eye-glow* color were the issue, I’d have to take the point.

 

(Another brief and furious author-debate ensues over whether eye-glow factors into this question)

 

Will this be a plot point later?[1]

Death:  (Grumbles)  I still say penalizing me for my eye-glow lineage-

Nemesis:  (Cough) –direct lineage from a Cyrway character- (cough)

Death:  (Sigh)

Nemesis:  Take the point.  It’s apparent later, due to being a plot point.

Nemesis:11 Death: 11 Rapture:17

 

Does the character have really nice hair that you describe more than once, or on the first page?[1]

Nemesis:  What are we, an Invsi fic?  No points.

 

Does the character have an accent which you do not share?[1]

(Headshakes all around)

Nemesis: No points.

 

Does the character have a scar or a strange marking that is noticed by another character, but does not actually detract from his/her appearance?[1]

Rapture:  Nope.

Nemesis:  (Looks away) Lots of them, and no.

Death:  Not at introduction, and no.

Nemesis: 12 Death: 11 Rapture:17

 

Is the character deaf, mute, or both?[1]

Rapture:  Nope.

Nemesis:  To misquote Fleur, “Are you trying to give our authors ideas?!?”

Death:  I think we settled this question back at the beginning of the quiz, didn’t we?

 

Is s/he no longer deaf and/or mute by the end of the story/series or else dead? (subtract 1 pt if character is alive and still deaf or mute at the end of the entire series)[3]

N/A

 

Is the character otherwise physically disabled? (anyone who says "She's so pretty that it's like a disability because everyone hates her or wants to have sex with her" will be summarily keelhauled)[subtract 2 pts]

Nemesis:  (Turns red)  Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

Nemesis: 10 Death: 11 Rapture:17

 

Is the character no longer disabled at the end of the series, or else dead?[1]

Nemesis:  (Turns redder)  Within four months of my arrival in the garg dimension, thank god.

Nemesis: 11 Death: 11 Rapture:17

 

Is the character mentally disabled? (read: at the functional level of Forrest Gump or below)[subtract 2]

Does the character have any telekinetic, telepathic, or other psychic powers despite / because of this disability?[3]

N/A, N/A

 

Is the character overweight? (not just "I ate too many Snackwells and now my thighs are HUGE, but honestly overweight)[subtract 2]

Death:  (Looks at Nem)  Pretty much the opposite.

Nemesis:  Blood doesn’t have a lot of calories, okay?

Rapture:  Don’t you eat regular food too?

Nemesis:  Look, I already take enough crap over this from Brooklyn, don’t you start too.

Death:  Don’t both of you get knocked up shortly after your intros?

Nemesis:  Yeah, and I barely gained weight, that’s why Lethe almost didn’t make it. (Glare)

Rapture:  Technically, until Mara posts another fic, I’m still pregnant.

 

Is this remarked upon by another character who is not motivated by jealousy?[subtract 2] Is the character no longer overweight by the end of the series?[4]

N/A

 

Section 3 - Personal Traits

Is the character the long-lost child or descendent or sibling of a regular or recurring character?[1]

All:  Errrr…

Of Brooklyn and/or Demona?[2]

Death:  I dispute Weisman’s assertion that I’m Brooklyn’s son.

Rapture: More points?!?  Waaaaaah!

Of Oberon and/or Puck?[2]

Nemesis:  Puck as a great-grandpa.

Of another original character for whom you intend to write another story or even another series?[1]

Others (look at Nem)  How many other series and original characters for you?

Nemesis: Uh, I forget.  All of my ancestors are either one or the other- I mean, shit, they’d have to be.  That’s not a fair question.

Rapture:  Just be glad you don’t get a point for each one of them.

Nemesis: 14 Death: 13 Rapture:19

 

Was the character adopted or did he/she otherwise live with people who were not his/her parents as a child?[1]

Rapture:  Ruler-wielding nuns!

Nemesis:  My parents were murdered when I was eight, and my older sisters took care of me.  Arguably I wasn’t a child after that anyway.

Death:  I don’t have parents.

Nemesis: 14 Death: 13 Rapture:20

 

Is the character a member or a friend of a hitherto unknown clan of gargoyles?[1]

Rapture: No.

Nemesis:  No.

Death:  I suppose the fact that nobody knew about us before we showed up might count…  Even though we didn’t exist but for about a month before that…

Nemesis:  What about Clan Moscow?

Death:  The question says member or friend…

Nemesis:  Ahhh.  Fair enough.

Nemesis: 14 Death: 14 Rapture:20

 

And is the last surviving member of that clan?[1]

N/A

 

Add points for each aspect seen somewhere during your character's life:

-abandoned by caregivers[1]
- born or forced into slavery[1]
- born or raised in extreme poverty[1]
- sole survivor of a calamity[2]
- physical abuse[2]
- sexual abuse by a caregiver[3]
- rape[3]
- member of a "despised" class or race[1, 2 if it is a plot point of the "I can make a contribution even thought I'm ... " variety]
- illegitimate birth[2]
- later parent of illegitimate child[1 pt each]
- any other life experience inspired by V.C. Andrews[3]

 

(Long pause while the authors get out their calculators)

 

Rapture:  (Totaling points)  I get five, I’m illegitimate, and I have three illegitimate kids…

Death:  (Totaling points)  I get five… Unless having a massively evil author counts as physical abuse.  (Pause, looks at Nem)  Or is it two now?

Nemesis:  (Distracted with lengthy total)  Hybrid Theory doesn’t count…  I get…let’s see…1…2…2…3…1…uh…you took a point for each illegitimate child, Rapture? Uh… Uh…Do I have to count the miscarriages?

Rapture: just count the ones that were birthed live. Or hatched…?

Nemesis: fi- wait, Egis was born Undead, so was Nyx…?

Rapture:  Count ‘em.

Nemesis: Five then. Wait, are we counting AU kids?

Death: NO.

Nemesis: Aaand 3 more, for the VC Andrews-esque other aspects of my life and unlife…for a total of…lesse…

Death: Seventeen.

Rapture:  Whoo-hoo!  I love Lynati.

Nemesis: 31 Death: 19 Rapture:25

 

Does the character suffer from guilt about something terrible that s/he did in the past?[1]

Rapture:  I regret nothing, and you can’t prove anything!

Nemesis:  No, I don’t experience guilt. That’s why I’m classified as a psychopath.

Death:  What about Lex?

Nemesis:  What about the Clone Wars?

Death:  I regret not smoking Thailog sooner.

Nemesis:  And what I did to Lex wasn’t *that* bad.

Rapture:  And what exactly was that?

Nemesis:  Became mates with him…sorta.

Nemesis: 32 Death: 20 Rapture:25

 

Do the other characters eventually convince her/him that it was not his/her fault?[1]

Death:  Do extra-dimensional travelers count?  (Sigh)

Nemesis: Wait, she actually *did* convince you? Cool, wait ‘till I tell Lyn…

Nemesis: 32 Death: 21 Rapture:25

 

Does the character share your religious beliefs?[1]
(Add an extra point if the character is a gargoyle or fay.)

Rapture:  When my author was religious.

Death:  We both believe that the universe is controlled by a sick fuck who tortures his creations for the sheer amusement value.  I just happen to have empirical proof of mine.

Nemesis: Nope.

Nemesis: 32 Death: 22 Rapture:26

 

Did the character have an unusual birth or unusual experience in early infancy? (i.e. abducted, placed in a basket and set afloat, visited by Three Weirdos, etc.)[1]

Rapture:  Nooooo…

Death:  Bull-shit!

Rapture:  Oh, right, not everyone gets worshiped by ritually celibate people.

Nemesis:  My early childhood was very happy.  Very happy indeed.  (Disturbing smile)

Death:  I didn’t have a childhood, or a birth.

Nemesis:  I’d count that as unusual.

Nemesis: 32 Death: 23 Rapture:27

Nemesis:  They’re catching up.

 

Does the character have a twin, a clone, or a sibling of the same gender?[2]

Death:  I *am* the clone.

Rapture:  Angie doesn’t count!  (Pouts again)

Nemesis:  We don’t have to take points for each, do we? I’ve got like six sisters. And then Trothe.

Nemesis: 34 Death: 23 Rapture:29

 

About whom you plan on writing another story later?[2]

Nemesis:  THAT’S NOT FAIR!!!  MY AUTHOR WRITES ABOUT EVERYONE SHE’S CREATED!!  …AND LOTS OF PEOPLE SHE HASN’T!!!

Nemesis: 36 Death: 23 Rapture:29

 

Does the character have a very good singing voice?[2]

Nemesis:  I like to sing, and I’m good at it, but I sound like I’ve been smoking since I was six.

Rapture:  No.

Death:  Not even before I started smoking.

Or play a musical instrument amazingly well?[1]

Death:  I dunno about amazingly.

Nemesis:  And that perfect rendition of Van Halen’s “Eruption” you busted out to impress Hyena after two decades of not touching a guitar was just a fluke then?

The guitar or flute, for instance?[2]

Nemesis:  I’ve had years of practice, and I still wouldn’t call myself amazing…  (Grumble)

Rapture:  Skin-flute?

Death:  Since when is that a musical instrument?

Rapture:  Well, Brooklyn makes some interesting noises…

Nemesis: 38 Death: 25 Rapture:29

 

Does the character have better taste in music than you do?[1]
(For example, does your character own cd's that you think educated people ought to own, even though you've never actually listened to the music yourself?)

Death:  If I say yes, I get a point.  If I say no, I acknowledge Aaron as having better taste…  Yes.

Nemesis:  Lynati actually owns those Shostakovich CDs.  We’re pretty similar in our musical tastes.

Rapture:  I’m like four years behind on current music, even when she was writing actively, so no.

Nemesis: 38 Death: 26 Rapture:29

 

Does the character do what you do for fun or profit?[1]
(This includes having the same job you have, or would like to have when you're older, or having a job that sounds like a lot of fun even though you know nothing about it. It can also mean RPing, computer programming, whatever.)

Nemesis: Lynati doesn’t even know how to throw knives, let alone properly take the hide of a still-breathing person, so, no.

Rapture: You do that for fun or profit?

Nemesis: Fun. Well, sometimes I get jobs that include it…so, both.

Death:  I’d like to see Aaron try to do my job.

Nemesis: What about what you do for fun?

Death:  He wouldn’t survive what I do for fun either.

Rapture:  If loving sex counts as a pastime, then I get a point.  I can live with that.

Nemesis: 38 Death: 26 Rapture:30

 

Is the character Alexander's nanny?[2]

All:  (Laugh hysterically)

 

Is the character royalty of any type?[3]

Death:  Well, my “grandmother” is some sort of arch-demon, but I don’t think that counts.

Rapture:  I’m technically descended from Prince Canmore… But that hardly counts in this day and age.

Nemesis:  Well, I’m descended from Jareth, you know…

Rapture:  From the Labyrinth?  The Goblin King?

Nemesis:  (Shrug) Lynati’s been “writing” a long time.

That she/he does not originally know about?[3]

Nemesis: (shakes head) It is known. You find out with Foxglove.

 

Does the character make more wisecracks than Brooklyn?[1]

All:  (Quoting Fleur) NO ONE MAKES MORE WISECRACKS THAN BROOKLYN!          

Because Brooklyn is your favorite character?[1]

Nemesis:  Actually, Brooklyn *is* my favorite character.

Rapture:  Join the club.

 

Does everyone end up liking the character (among the regulars you like)?[1]

Rapture:  No.

Nemesis:  Lynati likes all the Wyvern Clan, and Broadway and Goliath detest me.

Death:  Aaron likes Brooklyn, Brooklyn doesn’t like me, end of story.

Nemesis: 38 Death: 26 Rapture:30

 

Section 4 - Super Powers

The Fay:

Is the character at all or part fay?[1]

Death:  No.

Rapture:  Nope.

Nemesis:  (Shrug)  We’ve covered this already.  And I’ve already taken points for it.  This test is biased against the fay-blooded!

But doesn't find out until the middle or end of the story, or will find out in a future story you already have planned?[2]

Nemesis:  No, my grandmother finds out she’s Puck’s kid at age thirteen.  I’ve always known, not that it matters.  Much.

Is the character banished from Avalon or somehow not subject to the Gathering?[2]

Nemesis:  I’m not one of Oberon’s, so he has no control over me. Besides, he doesn’t know I exist. Anyway, not all Fay are subject to the Gathering in the first place.  Did you ever see any of Weisman’s version of the Unseelie Court on Avalon?  No.  It’s a flawed question.  No points.

 

Is the character allowed to go as he/she pleases from Avalon?[3]

Nemesis: Not hardly, and if Oberon ever finds out about me I’m pretty much a smoking hole in the ground.

Nemesis: 39 Death: 26 Rapture:30

 

The Rest:

Does the character, not being fay, have magical/mutant powers anyway?[2]

Nemesis:  Finally, some questions I can skip.

Rapture:  Nope.  Other than being mad sexy, of course.

Death:  (Does shadow-smoke thing)  Be nice if they were more useful.  But the stuff Demona taught me is handy now and then.

Nemesis: 39 Death: 28 Rapture:30

 

Does the character have telekinesis or telepathy? (Twins count.)[2]

Nemesis:  Dreamwalking ain’t telepathy.

Death:  If I was telekinetic, I’d use it to smack Pest.

Rapture:  Nope.  I’m pretty normal by comparison.

 

Does the character just "know things" for no apparent reason?[2]

Rapture:  Don’t know, don’t care, don’t wanna be in more fic to find out.

Nemesis:  No, that’s Kr’shai-la.

Death:  I know my author is going to screw us, but that’s based on observation.

 

Can the character fly?[1]

All:  (Resettle wings)

Without the aid of wings?[2]

Nemesis:  I’d like to see you fly without wings.

Death:  Anybody can do that.  It’s called a plane ticket.

Nemesis: *pauses* …Or in your case, being a flaming pinwheel blown off the top floor of a high-rise.

Death:  (Grumbles) 

Nemesis: 40 Death: 29 Rapture:31

 

Can the character heal with a touch and/or thought?[1]

Nemesis:  If I’m Invoked, I can rip you to shreds with a thought, but not so much on the putting-back-together side of things.

Rapture:  Nope.  Not a cleric.

Death:  I wish.

 

Do animals (especially fuzzy ones) instinctively like the character?[2]
(Subtract two points if the only animals that like the character are non-butterfly insects and crawly lizard-types.)

Rapture:  Snakes like me…  (Makes eyes at Death)

Death:  (Scoots away)

Nemesis:  No, but I like the fuzzy ones.  (Smiles widens to show fangs)  Hey, I lose two points!  I’m back down to 38!

Nemesis: 38 Death: 29 Rapture:31

 

Section 5 - The Love Connection

Does the character fall in love with and/or have sex with Owen and/or Brooklyn and/or Demona?[2] (If anyone writes a story with all three being "AND," send me a copy.)

Rapture:  Owen.  (Shudders)

Nemesis:  You *are* mated to Brooklyn.

Rapture:  And I’ve had an ambiguous sex scene with Demona.  Mara pioneered incestuous lesbianism years before it became fashionable in the Gargs fandom.

Nemesis:  But she’s you mother!

Rapture:  First, she’s Demona.  She’s also my Goddess.  Back me up Death.

Death:  I gotta go with Ronnie here.

Nemesis: I guess we should all be thankful she never tested the limits of your loyalty in that capacity then…

Death:  I live to serve…

Nemesis: So I’ve heard.

Rapture:  He’s just waiting for a direct order. (smirks)

Nemesis: 38 Death: 29 Rapture:33

 

Because you want to have sex with Owen and/or Brooklyn and/or Demona?[1]

Death:  Author guilty as charged.  (Shakes head)  But I didn’t answer yes to the first question, so no points for me.

Rapture:  Dang it.  Author guilty as charged.  For everyone but Owen.

Nemesis:  (Shakes head)

Nemesis: 38 Death: 29 Rapture:34

 

Does the character fall in love with and/or have sex with another recurring character from the show?[1]

Nemesis:  Luckily for me, both.

Death:  (Smiles)  Oh yeah.

Rapture:  Already covered.

Nemesis: 39 Death: 30 Rapture:34

 

With whom you would like to fall in love and/or have sex?[1]

Aaron:  I refuse to answer this one, as either answer has dire consequences.

Death: (glares at him)

Nemesis: Lyn thinks Lex is pretty cute, but…no.

Rapture:  Nope.

 

Does the character fall in love with and/or have sex with another original character?[1]

Nemesis: I love no other. *cough cough* Is this one cumulative too?

Death:  In the interests of time, let’s say no.

Rapture:  Me and Martyr?  That’s disgusting.  He’s physically a human eleven.

Death:  Whose original character?

Rapture:  Death you ignorant slut!  Is that where the previously mentioned illegitimate child came from?

Death:  Lynati needs to keep breeding new characters.

Nemesis:  Pretty much. Actually, she needs to stop killing characters off in the first place.

Nemesis: 40 Death: 31 Rapture:34

 

With whom you would like to fall in love and/or have sex?[1]

All:  Ehhhh…  No points.

 

Does the character's presence (eventually) make Goliath and Elisa (or Angela and Brooklyn or Angela and Broadway or any other pair of canon characters) realize they were meant for each other?[2]

Nemesis:  All of the above were mated off before I even showed up.

 

Does the story end with the character's wedding?[2]

N/A

Is it attended by more than one fay (other than Owen and Alexander)?[2]

N/A

 

Section 6 - The Real World and Your Character

Would you like to be friends with the character if you met in real life?[1]

Rapture:  I don’t care what she says, I’d kick her ass.  You try being pregnant for three fucking years.  With triplets! 

Nemesis:  Lynati says she sure as shit wouldn’t want me for an enemy…  “But then, who in their right mind would.”

Death:  Does the phrase “swift beheading” hold any meaning for you?

Nemesis: 41 Death: 31 Rapture:34

 

Do you think everyone who reads the story should automatically like the character and want to be friends with the character?[1]

Nemesis:  Oddly enough the phrase “not in their right mind” comes up again.

Death:  In my first appearance I beat the tar out of Broadway, and then get beaten about the head with a chair by Angela.  Not exactly conducive to favorable impressions.

Rapture:  Everyone should love me!  I’m charming, and sweet, and pretty, and mad sexy!

Nemesis:  (Eye rolls)

Nemesis: 41 Death: 31 Rapture:35

 

If someone tells you he/she doesn't like your character, do you take it as a personal attack on you?[1]

Nemesis:  Lynati takes everything personally.  That question’s moot.

Death:  My author never gets any fanmail.  So who knows?

Rapture:  I only attract positive feedback.  (Beams)

Death:  What about those people who write in complaining about how you talk to, and about, Goliath?

Rapture:  (Still smiling; sugary)  They can all go to Hell.

 

Do you ever pretend, just to yourself, that you are the character, with the same strengths and abilities?[1]

N/A.

Nemesis:  She’d have to take the disabilities with everything else.  Not a chance.

 

If someone calls your character a Mary Sue, do you immediately assume they're jealous of you?[3]

Rapture:  My author says people are jealous of her anyway, regardless of whether I’m a Mary Sue or not, but she’s self-absorbed.

Death:  Again, my author never gets any feedback.

Nemesis:  Well, fuck, mine hasn’t even posted hers yet.  So, no points.

Nemesis: 41 Death: 31 Rapture:35

 

Section 7 - The Fiendish Plot

Do you introduce the character on the first page of the story?[2]

Rapture:  Yes.

Nemesis:  I don’t even show up until the stories number in the double-digits.  And, I don’t think I’m on the first page of that one, but it’s not finished yet.

Death:  No.  Frank yes, but not me.

In the first sentence?[1]

Rapture:  And yes again.

Others:  No.

Nemesis: 41 Death: 31 Rapture:38

 

Do you tell the story from the character's point of view, all or mostly?[1]

Rapture:  I hate this test!

Nemesis:  My author’s been considering doing vignettes, but so far there’s been no first-person point of view from her.  Third person shifts around to everyone in a scene.

Death:  My author hasn’t learned to do anything but script format yet.

Nemesis: 41 Death: 31 Rapture:39

 

Does the character meet the gargoyles, and after a few tense pages of plot, become friends with them?[2]

Rapture:  I think we skipped the whole friendship phase.  And the few pages of tense plot. There was tension, but it was mostly a muscle-control thing…

Nemesis:  When I first met Brooklyn I attacked him, beat the crap out of him, paralyzed him, broke every bone in his left arm, and then permanently mutilated his left hand.  Then the first time I met Lex I was in blood lust and accidentally ripped into his throat.  …But they came around eventually. Took a few fics, actually.

Others:  (Slow turn to stare at Nem)

Nemesis:  What??

Death:  Moving along, not friends, tense plot or not.  No points.

 

Does the character manage to develop a friendship with an otherwise villainous character, and through this friendship, reform the other character?[2]

Rapture:  Reform the Goddess.  As if.

Death:  Once again, I have to go with her.

Nemesis: villains, villains…well…there was Hyena, but I wasn’t exactly friends with her, although I did manage to reform her into a- (glances at Death). …And my author has been careful to keep me away from Demona, for reasons I’m still unclear about. I’m not exactly the helping type, I’m too busy trying to keep it all together myself.

 

Is the villain in question Demona?[1]

N/A

Does the villain become evil again after the character dies, but retain some last vestige of goodness from his/her interaction with the character, evidenced in one selfless action at the end of the story?[4]

N/A

Is the character transformed into a gargoyle or into a magical or genetically-altered being?[5]

N/A

Is the character happier in her/his new form?[1]

Do people like the character better in her/his new form?[1]

Do you wish you could be transformed because of the neat powers?[1]

N/A, N/A, and “no”.

 

Does the character save the day and/or another character's life?[3]

Death: Not all of them.

Nemesis: (pats Death’s hand) Lex, yeah, probably others at points during Plot, but not “out of the blue, no one else can do it” type.

Rapture: Brendan wouldn’t think so. So no.

 

Through magical/mystical intervention?[1]

Nemesis: …teleportation via my own inherent power and use of the Trumps…yeah, I’d say that counts. ‘Tho technically it was the sun that saved him, I just got him there.

Death:  If forging the Soul Crusher counts, then, yes.

Through dying? (Turning to stone "forever" counts.)[3]

Nemesis:  Didn’t you bite it saving your rookery from Neo-Quarrymen?

Death:  Yes.

Through almost dying?[2]

Nemesis:  Vampiric Being plus Direct Sunlight equals BAD.

Death:  See the end of the Clone Wars for details.  The fact that I can answer “yes” to both sections of this question should tell you something about my author.

Does everyone go into mourning?[1]

Death:  Define “everyone.”

Does s/he get not-dead by the end of the story?[4]

Death:  No.

Will s/he get not-dead in the sequel?[4]

Death (glances at Nem):  In a different universe, after a long time, yeah.

Nemesis: 47 Death: 44 Rapture:39

 

Does the character go to Avalon at the end of the story?[2]
(no points if the character came from Avalon at the beginning of the story)

Death:  Never been.

Nemesis:  Me either.

Rapture:  Nope.

 

Does the character end up living at the clocktower/Castle Wyvern?[2]

Rapture:  A long time from now…  In a fic far far away…

 

Do you plan to write many more stories revolving around this character?[2]

Rapture:  God willing.

Death:  I’m afraid so.

Nemesis:  Ask a stupid question…

 

Do you plan to write one or more stories featuring this character's child(ren)?[2]

Nemesis:  Lynati already has stories featuring my grandchildren.

Death:  Mine too.  Thanks Lyn.

Rapture:  Yeshua, Set, and Mari Anath will be pivotal if my author ever starts writing again.

Totals:  Nemesis: 51 Death: 48 Rapture:47


Possible Points: 170 (assuming some questions obviate the rest) Preliminary testing suggests the following basic scoring scheme:

0-14 Developed character, unlikely MS.
15-20 Borderline character. Characters in this range are potential MS's, who can go either way dependent on the author's skill.
21+ Mary Sue/Gary Stu. Proceed with greatest caution.
35+ Reconsider your character and plot. Please.

 

The Authors:  Naaaaaaaaaaah.

 

Naeren: I bid you lick me; I got 21 points

 

Aaron:  There’s 170 possible points, but anything over 35, which is less than 21% of the possible points, comes up as a Mary Sue.  I’ve always thought this test was whacked. 

 

 

*

Referenced peoples:

Fleur - http://home.pacific.net.au/~ldousha/

Norcumi - http://norcumi.gargles-fans.org/

Shinigami (Mara) - http://mazokupuppet.artchicks.org/

Lynati - http://lynativerse.artchicks.org/Index.htm